Dealing With Casual Bias in Polite Company
“Do people ever tell you that you look just like everyone on [Fresh Off the Boat]?”
Every minority has fielded some version of that comment, writes Nicole Chung, Managing Editor of The Toast, in a recent essay called, "What Goes Through Your Mind: On Nice Parties and Casual Racism." In it, she describes being confronted with this question by a stranger at a dinner party, and her stunned and unsatisfying reaction. The experience made her wonder: is anyone else noticing this? And if this happens so often to me, why don't I have a better response in place?
Listeners called in to share their experiences of handling unpleasant, unsolicited, identity-driven comments in social settings.
How did you respond at the time? And, if you had a second chance at it, how do you wish you’d responded?
You can keep the conversation going anytime on Twitter: @BrianLehrer.
What we're reading:
Posted by Brian Lehrer on Tuesday, 5 January 2016
This article has been haunting me @BrianLehrer. I have shared it extensively bc I exp casual racism amidst my white in laws all the time.
— Yazmin Khan (@KhanChronicles) January 11, 2016
@BrianLehrer Almost every question/comment from whites about my hair and about weed when it's found I'm Jamaican.
— Toni Blake (@ToniBlakePR1) January 11, 2016
@BrianLehrer @nicole_soojung 1/2 It's an opportunity 2 educate. I tell ppl I'm Dominican: "But u don't look it" I reply, "Actually, I do" :)
— Gizelle Lugo (@GizelleSays) January 11, 2016
@BrianLehrer Latina lawyer here - can't count the number of times Family Ct judges have thought I'm the client despite my suit & case files.
— Isabel (@MlleIsabelH) January 11, 2016
@BrianLehrer @nicole_soojung I have been known on occasion to smile sweetly and say, wow didn't know you were a racist.
— Saadia Faruqi (@SaadiaFaruqi) January 11, 2016
@BrianLehrer @nicole_soojung haha, last time I said this to very close relatives. They were shocked but at least didn't repeat the comment.
— Saadia Faruqi (@SaadiaFaruqi) January 11, 2016
Often simply confronting someone who has said or done something racist can leave me labeled as person that is "obsessed w/race" @BrianLehrer
— Mr. Kunle (@KunleIRAK) January 11, 2016
