Firemen on September 11th

New York, NY —

As anticipated, yesterday was a solemn day for the city's firefighters. Nearly one out of every ten people who died last September 11th was a New York City firefighter and each firehouse held its own ceremony to commemorate the loss. WNYC's Beth Fertig has this report on those remembrances.

Breakfast was quiet at the firehouse on West 38th street. The men of Engine company 34 and Ladder company 21 said little as they ate their eggs together while watching television. Thirty-year old James Bruno had just finished an overnight shift.

BRUNO: I feel like if I went home I'd probably have like anxiety or something like that going home. I think I'd have to stay here. I wasn't here last year on the 11th, I came in from home and I think that plays a big part over and over with my psyche. You know being in the firehouse. It's very therapeutic at times. It's very disheartening at times you know.

Bruno works for the engine company - which was spared on September 11th. But all seven members of Ladder Company 21 who raced downtown on the big truck that morning perished. None of the bodies was ever recovered. James Bruno says he thought about them a lot in the last few days.

BRUNO: You know I just had a baby. And he's never going to meet Joe and Jerry and Billy and Keith.

FIREFIGHTER: The following members of tower ladder 2-1 who made the supreme sacrifice September 11th, 2001.

Just before 8:46, the firefighters moved their engine and ladder trucks out onto the sidewalk. Then, in a ceremony repeated at every firehouse in the city, they lined up on the curb for a moment of silence and read the names of those who were killed.

FIREFIGHTER: Lieutenant Michael Foder (ring). Firefighter Jerald Duffy (ring)

The men stood shoulder to shoulder, and struggled to keep from crying. They continued standing for nearly an hour as the names of all 343 members who died were broadcast over a loudspeaker.

Most wore their regular blue shirts and shorts. But 35 year-old Jim McNally was in full dress uniform. Photos of the seven men from his ladder company who died were pasted under his cap. He said it was hard to believe a year had passed.

MCNALLY: When we were down there digging at Ground Zero it seemed like it was going on and on and on, the days were really long and it just seemed like it happened so long ago. And now here we are at the year anniversary it feels like yesterday it's hard to explain.

Feelings were hard to express in words. After the ceremony, everyone was quiet. Some guys stood by themselves. Another firefighter stuck a long red rose in the grate of the ladder truck: a vehicle named the Pride of Hell's Kitchen. Its survival on September 11th is another source of pride. Some guys skipped the ceremony to pay their respects at the site of the World Trade Center. Firefighter Bob Hofer called that a personal choice.

HOFER: I'll make my way down there. But this is where they were at 8:46. This is where I wanted to be.

Still, without a full house, West 38th street was a pretty lonely place. It's right by the Lincoln Tunnel, so there isn't a lot of foot traffic. And no family members attended the ceremony. There will be yet another ceremony for the entire firehouse and its extended family on Saturday.

This was not the case across town at Engine 16 and Ladder Company 7.

The ceremony for this firehouse on East Twenty ninth street off second avenue was so busy, the street was closed to accommodate all the cars and visitors who spilled out onto the pavement. A probationary firefighter named John DeRose took over the task of tenderly placing the piles of flowers into buckets of water.

DEROSE: Even the people from the neighborhood stopped by for the mass. It's a good show of support.

Lisa Adler was one of those.

ADLER: I just brought by some flowers, felt like it was something to do. The least I could do.

Local restaurants donated food. Some have held multiple fundraisers over the past year. This firehouse lost nine men at the Trade Center. And another firefighter died in the spring during what was supposed to have been a simple surgical procedure. Pictures of all ten are now displayed by a shrine. Firefighter Steve Marsar helped organize the ceremony - which included a religious service.

MARSAR: The families really wanted to do something at the firehouse. This is their family, this is where they come, we can all be together. They don't need to tell anybody how they feel. It doesn't even have to be said. Big hugs and kisses for everybody. Nothing has to be said. It's an unspoken feeling going on. How you doing man?

Erin Cain needed that experience. She wore a bracelet with the names of all the firefighters who died from this company and a button with a picture of her brother, George.

CAIN: I definitely wanted to be at the firehouse. I was with my brother on the night of September 10th at dinner here with all the guys and this is where he was happy. So when I come here I try to hold on to that.

But as the firefighters returned to work yesterday, it's clear that September 11th is far from over. Gary Michael Lamb is stationed at a firehouse in Hollis, Queens. He came to 29th street because he grew up with one of the men who died.

LAMB: Come here and remember. We hope that others in the outside world do not forget. That's key not to forget September 11th. Cause it's not over. I personally - I want payback. It's rather simple.

Most of the firefighters seem exhausted with grief. And the extra responsibilities they've assumed.

On West 38th Street, at the Hells Kitchen firehouse, 44 year-old Bob Hofer is planning to retire. He's been a firefighter for 20 years. Between funeral after funeral, and helping the families of the men who died, the divorced father says he craves more time for his own three kids.

HOFER: You know my 15 year old son Craig and I were in the pool the other day. He said Dad you know . He said uh... I grew up with my father saying I love my job. Love to go to work. Can't wait to get there. I love the guys. I don't love my job no more. It's changed. There's a big part missing that just we can't get back. We'll never get back.

But there is one element of the job firefighters still enjoy, perhaps now more than ever. On September 10th, a man ventured into the Hells Kitchen firehouse with a small boy and a video camera. Bob Hofer lit up when he saw them lingering by the door.

HOFER: How you doing I'm Bob. Want to come in and jump in?

Helping the boy into the driver's seat of the Ladder Truck, Hofer couldn't help but tell him where that that big red vehicle had been.

HOFER: Pretty cool huh. This sucker was down at the trade center. KID: Cool.

The child's father, Michael Mazaik, said they had traveled a hundred miles, from their home in Connecticut, just to visit Ground Zero on September 11th. Like everyone else, he said, it was the least we could do. For WNYC I'm Beth Fertig.