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My husband and I moved to Bayside to tkae care of his elderly mother a few years back. At the time, we were not yet married and had just moved into a rent stabilized pre-war building across from Prospect Park in Brooklyn. We both loved our neighborhood and still miss the space (as we are living in a small basement apartment of his mother's house) but we've made it work in spite of it all. I agree with an earlier comment that no matter how big or small your dwelling, it is important to have your own "space." This is crucial to a long-lasting relationship.
Yay Jersey City!
When my husband and I were first dating (or in the first year), he decided to buy a condo in Hoboken. I was sooo reluctant to move out of New York, but after putting in our 'dues' in Hoboken, we were actually able to sell our condo and buy a brownstone in the Hamilton Park neighborhood of Jersey City.
We've been married for quite awhile now, but I had I not been 'forced' to move, we ended up where we are today - in a fabulous neighborhood!
My boyfriend decided to move to NYC from San Francisco, against my advice at the time... He was "staying with me" until he found a place, but ended up living there without even looking for 6 months! In the end, he was very insulted that I suggested he look harder.I know it's hard to find a place here, but come on! Obviously, it didn't work out in the end and after we weren't in the same bedroom, he was very fast in finding a sublet in Harlem. Go figure hahaha
What about coops in Manhattan occupied by the single adult child of the owners, when later a fiancee wants to move in? Can coop boards disallow that? Is that something that makes people marry prematurely?
It was so refreshing to hear someone who doesn't want to live in Manhattan (I think Jessica was her name?). I've never had any desire to live there, but when I admit to it, you'd think I had two heads and didn't want one removed. Hoboken is plenty close enough.
I lived in Clinton Hill, Brooklyn and dated a man who lived in Jersey City for 2 years. If you care about someone, you make it work! If someone won't ride the subway for 40 minutes to see you, he's not worth it.
Doctor Sheldon Cholst, in "Finding Love in a Cold War," came to the conclusion that the most successful marriages/partnerships is when each individual has their own space so their solitude is protected. The biggest regret of my life is giving up a rent stabilized apartment to move in with wife, who I am currently divorced from.
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