Streams

Friendkeeping

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Julie Klam, author of Friendkeeping: A Field Guide to the People You Love, Hate, and Can't Live Without, talks about making and keeping friends as adults (even in an election year).

→ Julie Klam will be at Barnes & Noble on October 25th at 7 p.m.

Guests:

Julie Klam

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Comments [8]

Naomi Youngstein from NJ

In early 2011 my father died. A woman with whom I was friendly through volunteering (but not friends) called me and talked to me for 3/4 hour about my dad. When I hung up I felt like myself after weeks of feeling burnt out. I knew I had to become friends with her and suggested a few months later that we walk in our local park. She's since become a very close friend to me, and I feel like its a miracle to make such a friend in my late forties.

Oct. 18 2012 12:40 PM

I started making new adult friends by joining Meetup groups.great way foe new activities and new friends

Oct. 18 2012 11:41 AM
Maude from Park Slope

Does the author have any thoughts on how women in particular can become "too close", maybe codependent, to the detriment of the rest of their lives. I had a friend like this and we inevitably had to "break up", which was really painful but probably much better for both of us in the long run.
I feel like this was a growing up process where boundaries are more important in my friendships these days.

Oct. 18 2012 11:41 AM
Elle from Brooklyn

There's nothing more fascinating than their kids to people who have them and nothing more boring to people who don't. Thus, the world divides into two kinds of people. It's inevitable.

Oct. 18 2012 11:39 AM
Inquisigal from Brooklyn

I find it strange that people have trouble making friends as adults; I've found it to be pretty easy, because adult friends better represent your adult interests and way of life. The more involved you are in life, friendships actually come quite naturally. I've made friends with people I've met in my neighborhood at block association meetings; through a local blog that I write for; in the past, at the dog park; and through my arts group. I find aduklt friendships liberating, because it's easier to cut to the chase and make plans to hang out with people without the long, drawn-out feeling-people out process that accompanies friendships when you're younger.

Oct. 18 2012 11:39 AM

I'd rather listen to a half-hour of fund raising than this vapid conversation.
Seeya later.

Oct. 18 2012 11:38 AM
Cate from Brooklyn

The hard part about "friend-keeping" through the years -or the main impediment I've faced personally -is when one person has kids and a partner, and the other doesn't. I can't begin to count the number of people who've outright vanished on me because I've chosen to focus on my career instead of kids/husband. I'd be curious to hear your guest's thoughts around this.

Oct. 18 2012 11:37 AM
Connie from nj

I have two close friends that I made in a bereavement group when my husband died in 2001.
Also, I recently joined NJ Audubon and go on frequent birding trips. I've made several friends there. It's built in that we have an interest in common!

Oct. 18 2012 11:36 AM

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