Streams

Your Same-Sex Marriage Proposals

Monday, June 27, 2011

New York State legalized gay marriage on Friday -- are you getting hitched? Call in to propose on-air, or tell us about your proposal over the weekend? Or maybe you're in a gay relationship but aren't rushing into marriage? Give us a call 212.433.WNYC. The phones and comments page are open, tell us your story!

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Comments [29]

Mikey from Staten Island

It's about time that ALL marriage gets banned permanently. Nobody should enter into this outdated and outmoded institution.

Feb. 28 2012 06:10 PM
Karen from NTC

I'm listening to this segment on Monday afternoon on the WNYC web site. It's a great segment; what are people complaining about? The point about changing the the law is that discrimination is not an abstraction, but affects real people We are hearing from those real people as they celebrate having finally won the right to marry.

Good job as usual, Brian

Jun. 27 2011 04:43 PM
eva

While I don't think the state should be involved in the marriage business, it is undeniably a day of celebration that New York has made a small gesture toward equality.
And I think the on-air proposal idea is very sweet. And deserved.
The only thing I would point out is the disparity between the attention lavished by WNYC on this issue (every public radio station needs to curry favor with its donor bases) and the non-attention given to SERIOUS (i.e., ACTUAL) human rights issues, e.g. the shocking conditions in which we house prisoners. Thank you inane mandatory sentencing and the drug war.
Heads-up to hjs: those rotting in prison can't donate, so they don't constitute a human rights issue, and can rot in prison for all wnyc and its listenership could care.

Jun. 27 2011 01:56 PM
SD from New York

It's not just Brian who's been so shamelessly gleeful.
WNYC was plugging this segment all weekend.

These folks are so wrapped up in their own little world that haven't a clue as to just how offensive it is for many of us to have this shoved in our faces.

Jun. 27 2011 01:53 PM
Erin from Long Island City, Qns

Why are some people hatin' on this segment? I'm straight, politically moderate and I found it innovative way to approach story by bringing in voices of people it impacts most.

Its not like Lehrer doesn't do in-depth news and policy analysis all time. lighten up.

Very sweet.

Jun. 27 2011 12:05 PM

The subtext to many of the negative comments here seems to be the old homophobic grumble, "I don't care what you [gays and lesbians] do, just don't rub my face in it." Sorry, if there was ever a time for the media to rub everyone's face in gay and lesbian culture, these last few days are it. This segment was timely, moving, and absolutely appropriate. Feeling bad about being on wrong side of history? Get over it.

Jun. 27 2011 11:58 AM
Cheryl Clarke from Jersey City, N.J.

Listening to Brian Lehrer's Show this morning as he discussed the recent passage of same-sex marriage. He or his guest made a reference to ten years down the road when same-sex marriage will become passe, and we will move on to "same sex divorce and same sex [child] custody battles." And Brian chided us to "Join the real world." I know he thinks he is speaking only to lesbian and gay people who have not experienced marriage.

While gays and lesbians have not had the benefit of legal marriage (and we really still don't in terms of the Federal Govt.), many, many of us have been in heterosexual marriages and are not strangers to divorce, child custody battles with spouses who have not always been so kind, especially to women who have had to give up custody of their children because former spouses have declared them "unfit mothers." So, the passage of the same sex marriage legislation in New York is a mixed blessing--more than a wedding cake with a same sex couple confection on the top and a photo in the New York times Sunday Wedding Section. I hope lesbians and gays will continue to struggle for marriage rights for all those who wish to secure them to enhance the quality of their lives.

Jun. 27 2011 11:49 AM
Michael from New York

I will put all my cards down as I begin this comment. I am a Catholic and did not support the recent vote of the State Legislature to legalize same-sex marriage. But, so be it, it is the law in New York State now. As such, I realize that New York Public Radio has the right and especially the journalistic obligation to report on this recent event that affects all of us. And as part of that reporting you would obviously interview those people who are gay or lesbian to get their viewpoints This is beyond dispute and as a former reporter I support that right and obligation. But giving the radio station over to allow for on-air proposals? Is this really newsworthy? It just seems unnecessary and in poor taste to me.

Jun. 27 2011 11:40 AM
Michael from New York

I will put all my cards down as I begin this comment. I am a Catholic and did not support the recent vote of the State Legislature to legalize same-sex marriage. But, so be it, it is the law in New York State now. As such, I realize that New York Public Radio has the right and especially the journalistic obligation to report on this recent event that affects all of us. And as part of that reporting you would obviously interview those people who are gay or lesbian to get their viewpoints This is beyond dispute and as a former reporter I support that right and obligation. But giving the radio station over to allow for on-air proposals? Is this really newsworthy? It just seems unnecessary and in poor taste to me.

Jun. 27 2011 11:38 AM
Jami from NYC

Brian thanks for your people-centric, down-to-earth coverage of this controversial political football of an issue. You have always brought home LGBT - and straight - issues like no one else; I especially appreciate your unique brand of radio programming at this historic moment in our city and state's history. I DO love to listen ;)

Jun. 27 2011 10:53 AM
nancy

Pride Party and Mass Ceremony in Staten Island!
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=181591851893621

Jun. 27 2011 10:42 AM
Lupe V from Brooklyn

an important story for sure, but the Monday lead-lead off segment? really? Wars, economies collapsing, budget issues, etc. Problems that affect 100% of the population... this show just doesn't have the quality it once did.

Jun. 27 2011 10:35 AM
Meg from New York

My fiancee and I have been engaged for two and a half years now. Our upbringing made marriage important to both of us, and as long as at least one state had equal marriage rights we were going to make this happen. I was a little taken aback at how much being able to marry in the state I live in mattered to me on Friday - we already had a date set and were planning on DC. But being able to marry in New York means a heck of a lot more.
So, no new proposals from this young whippersnapper, but new wedding plans for sure! :)

Jun. 27 2011 10:34 AM
Rstorm from Hell's Kitchen

My partner of thirty years and I have never considered marriage. We bought an apartment together, that was enough. Our approaches to finances are too disparate -- I'm much too slapdash and would never entangle him in my money mess. Not being married has in some way kept us together.

I know lots of straight couples who have never married and no one asks them "when are you getting married." Such a question seems rude and intrusive. More power to the gays who wish to marry but there are those of us who won't and shouldn't be pressured into it...

Jun. 27 2011 10:34 AM
Mike from Park Slope

It was pretty sneaky but I do believe I just saw shameless advertising on the comments page.

Jun. 27 2011 10:33 AM
FR

Marriage proposals on air? Is that the best use of our air time? Typical of "The Brian Lehrer Gossip Program".

Jun. 27 2011 10:33 AM
Gloria


Brian, I'm glad you're doing this segment to celebrate NY State's progress on marriage equality, but it's not the case, as you stated at the top of the piece, that everyone has the same rights now in terms of domestic relations.

In financial terms, many of the big ticket items are tied to federal recognition of relationships -- estate taxes and Social Security benefits. And all non-hetero-couples who share health insurance will continue to pay hefty federal taxes (over $1000 a year) on the benefit until DOMA is overturned.

Meanwhile, polyamorous people and those in non-conjugal relationships, sometimes who are family members, are excluded from the kinds of protections that are being sought only for romantic pairs.

I recently read about a couple who both worked outside the home and a few years back, one of their brothers moved into their home after losing his job and is now the full time caretaker to this couple's child. They consider this a long-term arrangement and the working sibling wanted to share his health insurance with his stay-at-home brother, but that is of course not possible.

Of course, Medicare-for-all would help solve some of these issues.

Jun. 27 2011 10:32 AM
Elizabeth from NYC

Congratulations to all of society for this. Question: Next step for change: Tax Reform: No tax breaks to marrieds and parents. It's unfair that people with dependents pay less taxes while the childless pay for public education! Craziness.

Jun. 27 2011 10:31 AM
Robert from NYC

Ask Tom why the bill never passed nor got the floor under the Democrats!! It's passed under a Republican leadership,Tom.

Jun. 27 2011 10:30 AM
carolita from NYC

Oh, you above downers, give it up. I personally don't believe in marriage (for myself) at all-- (I think it's a religious rite I have no interest in when done in the church, and a capitulation to convention when done by the state), -- but I"m happy for everyone who couldn't be married before if they can now. Particularly those who need it because of society denying them rights they didn't have under an otherwise committed relationship. (Let's hope those who DON'T get married will still receive or fight for those rights). Brian letting them propose on air is just another way of celebrating.

Jun. 27 2011 10:28 AM
Sophie from Poughkeepsie NY

Most hetro women don't propose either. Why not a segment on women who buy the ring, propose and have them propose on air?

I wouldn't want to hear those proposals either.

Jun. 27 2011 10:28 AM
Julia Newman from Williamsburg, Brooklyn

I am a wedding photographer in NYC and have been waiting for this moment for years. I know this will lead to many courthouse weddings in late summer. In celebration, I would like to donate my photography services to one couple who are putting together a last minute courthouse wedding! Congratulations, New York! I'm so proud!

Jun. 27 2011 10:25 AM
Mike from Park Slope

Brian,
I'm a big fan. I listen almost every day and generally think you do great work on this show. And I'm thrilled that NY approved same-sex marriage. Its not just a victory for the LGBT community, but a win for all of us who don't want our civil society governed by the whims of religious extremists.

But a call in to propose on the air? This is rather kitsch, possibly voyeurism, and frankly, boring. What do I care what it sounds like when two people I've never met propose? If I actually know them perhaps I'll get the story over a glass of wine. On this show, can you please keep the conversation at least relevant. Thanks!

Jun. 27 2011 10:24 AM
john from office

I wish the gay community all the best. I have alot of gay friends and this is a good thing.

But, Brian is out of control on this subject. This has been presented as a given.

Jun. 27 2011 10:20 AM
Brett from Manhattan

I'm a middle-aged, happily married heterosexual Christian. On Saturday, my wife told me that somehow, our marriage now seems a little more sacred than it was before. I realized she was right. Had the marriage equality bill been defeated as it was in 2009, our marriage would have seemed defiled in a way. No one can completely have or enjoy any right or status that is unfairly denied to others in one's society. Congratulations New York!

Jun. 27 2011 10:19 AM
Jim

I think it's great that same-sex couples can get married, but I don't want to hear their proposals or ANYBODY else's on the radio -- same-sex, hetero, poly, cat and dog. Don't want to hear it. (And yes, I'm tuning out this schmaltz.)

Jun. 27 2011 10:15 AM
matthew from new rochelle

lame ;-) Youre turning into a novelty Brian

Jun. 27 2011 10:12 AM
matthew

This segment that is, not you Brian :-))

Jun. 27 2011 10:09 AM

brian
thanks for all your support and all the time you've given this human rights issue.

Jun. 27 2011 10:01 AM

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