A Modest Proposal For Medicaid

Thursday, January 27, 2011 - 12:00 AM

At some point in our lives there will have to be someone who makes the ‘tough’ decisions. And by tough decisions I don’t mean the choice of red or white wine with dinner. I mean the tough decisions that our ancestors made many years ago. Who do we kill?

Before man had invented healthcare administrations run by the pharmaceutical-industrial complex, all he had were tough decisions. Do we leave grandpa, or carry him with us across the tundra? As you might imagine, there were many times grandpa didn’t make the trip. Man had to operate in this manner to survive droughts, harsh winters and even animal attacks. As time has moved on and man has become more advanced we have been able to allow grandpa some comfort in getting old, but now that our economic system is on the skids, it's time to look deep into the eyes of the elderly and tell them that tough decisions are coming.

Here in NYC our mayor has informed us that the civil servants who've been working with the belief that they'll have a modicum of pension benefits for their twilight years had better rethink their retirement. As if it weren’t bad enough that some retirees were receiving a couple of hundred dollars a month to live off, their belts are about to get tighter. This means that when grandpa does get to eat, instead of tuna fish from the can it will have to be cat food. I also think that America is going to have to reconsider the notion of ‘retirement’ if we are to live up to the true promise of capitalism.

From this point on, retirement or your last day on the job should be like having your Last Day in the novel, Logan’s Run. All retirees are taken to an island where they are summarily executed, er, um, permanently retired. This plan will save us billions of dollars in healthcare insurance and Medicaid funds which can then be put to use in building more prisons, bailing out more Wall Street bankers, and developing alternative sources of energy. This plan also helps America realize its capitalist destiny. No more wasteful socialist medical programs. Killing our elderly will be like killing communism.

And since we are preserving capitalism, child labor and chattel slavery are also back on the table. We've got to get this unemployment rate down to zero if we are going to compete with China. At some point in our lives, the tough decisions will have to be made. Do we continue to invest in Wall Street, or easy street, for the elderly who are allowed to stop working just because they’ve reached their 70th year? Stop being socialists, America. Do it for grandpa.

Dallas Penn is the creator and editor-in-chief of the daily weblog He is also a founding member of the film-making collective, iNternets Celebrities. Currently a featured columnist on AOL’s, Dallas is known for his contributions to various hip-hop websites, including XXL Magazine, and YouTube videos tackling subjects like social justice, affordable food and all around chicanery. He can always be found online at his website and on Twitter. Or sometimes on VH1’s The Best Week Ever. But only if you do a Google search.


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Comments [8]

Dallas from kings county

@Elijah Could everyone afford healthcare if we removed all the regulations? Could we afford the cost of medicine to maintain our so called health?

Free market capitalism correcting itself or showing compassion for those who need help is pure fiction. You must not have lived long enough to know this.

Throw grandpa from the train Elijah, if you really believe in a free market. Maybe the free market won't be a free fall

Jan. 30 2011 11:17 PM
Elijah McDougal from Yonkers, NY

Your sarcasm totally misses the mark. It is you SOCIALISTS who want to ration healthcare. Anything run by the government has to be rationed and parceled out in accord with some cost-effective formula., and the decisions are always made by faceless bureaucrats. In a truly free market system there would be more competition, less regulation, and costs would come way down. Everyone would be able to purchase a health care plan that works for them at a price they could afford, rather than being forced into a one-size-fits-all program. . Today, with insurance companies hampered by state regulations and mandates, the whole market has become distorted. As I said, it is you socialists who want to "kill grampa" because taking care of him costs too much.I

Jan. 28 2011 09:52 PM
Mohabee Serrano

I wonder if the writer of this essay wants to "retire" the way he suggests older workers might? I think there's a more reasonable means of "helping" Grandpa than shooting him on a desert island.

Jan. 28 2011 01:29 PM
Dallas from kings county

@JulieBeezy The next crop of soldiers will be gay drones (don't ask, don't tell)

*raises hand*
**relinquishes middle class aspirations**
***re-reads Logan's Run***

Jan. 28 2011 05:24 AM
Brother Bear

I'd like every idiot civil servant who voted for Bloomberg-- and voted for any NYC city councilmember who allowed his third term-- to raise their hand now.

Then correlate the attack on civil servant pensions to Bloomberg initiated "City Time" fiasco.

Bloomberg is not-- alas-- alone in this form of (aspiring) middle-class warfare but let's not pretend it's anything but THAT.

It's also convenient smokescreen to attack the Dept. of Sanitation for one's own vast failings. Ya'll really think San Men would do a slowdown on behalf of ** management **?

Are there dopes, crooks and incompetents in unions? Sure, a few. And that differs from the systematic thievery of private enterprise... how?


Brother Bear

Jan. 27 2011 12:22 PM
Julie Beezy from Brook-Nam

This fits in perfectly with the self-destruct button many returning war vets have... The new improved self-off timer upon returning home also means no pesky benefits for the fam left behind & more to inve$t in training the next crop of soldiers. It's better business...

Jan. 27 2011 10:25 AM
Hearing Tests from India/Delhi

Its your nice health care place and one more relaited to you best Hearing Tests heath care place its also populate with Hearing Aids for last 15 years though We have focused more on hearing.

Jan. 27 2011 02:01 AM
buddypaul from ca

I dont feel like i should be forced to have health insurance, I think everyone would like to have health insurance if they could afford it. If you need affordable health insurance search online "Wise Health Insurance" you dont want to be with out insurance any time.

Jan. 27 2011 12:38 AM

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