A Modest Proposal For Medicaid

At some point in our lives there will have to be someone who makes the ‘tough’ decisions. And by tough decisions I don’t mean the choice of red or white wine with dinner. I mean the tough decisions that our ancestors made many years ago. Who do we kill?

Before man had invented healthcare administrations run by the pharmaceutical-industrial complex, all he had were tough decisions. Do we leave grandpa, or carry him with us across the tundra? As you might imagine, there were many times grandpa didn’t make the trip. Man had to operate in this manner to survive droughts, harsh winters and even animal attacks. As time has moved on and man has become more advanced we have been able to allow grandpa some comfort in getting old, but now that our economic system is on the skids, it's time to look deep into the eyes of the elderly and tell them that tough decisions are coming.

Here in NYC our mayor has informed us that the civil servants who've been working with the belief that they'll have a modicum of pension benefits for their twilight years had better rethink their retirement. As if it weren’t bad enough that some retirees were receiving a couple of hundred dollars a month to live off, their belts are about to get tighter. This means that when grandpa does get to eat, instead of tuna fish from the can it will have to be cat food. I also think that America is going to have to reconsider the notion of ‘retirement’ if we are to live up to the true promise of capitalism.

From this point on, retirement or your last day on the job should be like having your Last Day in the novel, Logan’s Run. All retirees are taken to an island where they are summarily executed, er, um, permanently retired. This plan will save us billions of dollars in healthcare insurance and Medicaid funds which can then be put to use in building more prisons, bailing out more Wall Street bankers, and developing alternative sources of energy. This plan also helps America realize its capitalist destiny. No more wasteful socialist medical programs. Killing our elderly will be like killing communism.

And since we are preserving capitalism, child labor and chattel slavery are also back on the table. We've got to get this unemployment rate down to zero if we are going to compete with China. At some point in our lives, the tough decisions will have to be made. Do we continue to invest in Wall Street, or easy street, for the elderly who are allowed to stop working just because they’ve reached their 70th year? Stop being socialists, America. Do it for grandpa.

Dallas Penn is the creator and editor-in-chief of the daily weblog dallaspenn.com. He is also a founding member of the film-making collective, iNternets Celebrities. Currently a featured columnist on AOL’s theBVX.com, Dallas is known for his contributions to various hip-hop websites, including XXL Magazine, and YouTube videos tackling subjects like social justice, affordable food and all around chicanery. He can always be found online at his website and on Twitter. Or sometimes on VH1’s The Best Week Ever. But only if you do a Google search.