On Demand
Following Up: Men's Work
Friday, September 28, 2007
Listeners call in about what household tasks men are "happy" to do, following up on Wednesday's interview with David Leonhardt about gender and happiness.
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My favorite household chores are cooking and leaving the apartment.
In our house, he cooks and I clean. It works out quite nicely since I am a woman who has never enjoyed cooking and my fiancée is a fantastic cook.
Bringing home the Tofu!
I do any chores that involve leaving the apartment and lifting things. I take the trash and recycling to the chute down the hall, and I do the laundry, since that's also down the hall. In return, she cleans the bathroom. Feel free to argue the fairness of this arrangement.
The rest of the chores are shared.
Forgot to say, since he cooks, he also does all the grocery shopping. I hate grocery shopping and he loves it.
He does the dishes and the cat litter.
I do the floors and the cooking.
We each do our own laundry (I drop mine off)
I know several couples where men do the dishes.
My exboyfriend changed the lightbulbs (because I couldn't reach them) and complained about it. That was all. Hence "ex."
I'm 27 and have been married for 4 years to my wife from Puerto Rico. We both work full-time jobs. By far, and she would agree with me completely, I do the majority of the housework: cooking, straightening-up clutter, doing dishes, taking out garbage, yard work and home improvement projects. I also take care of most of the household finances. Although I know that I do it all pretty well, it's not entirely by choice. I feel the most perturbed by undone housework. My wife doesn't care nearly as much.
Don
Poughkeepsie
Gender shmender.
I was raised by two working parents. My dad was THE cook, left the kitchen a mess, but eventually cleaned up. I've seen both parents mop the floor, do the dishes, and the laundry. We also had a housekeeper once a week. But, overall, I'd say it was equal. And, by the time I was eleven, i was sweeping, cleaning, cooking, and laundering with them!
When with my (female) partner, we shared lceaning responsibnlites. She'd cook, I'd do the dishes, or vice-versa. I'd help ehr tidy up her place, she'd help me tidy up mine. I don't there is connection between gender and housework.
When it come to cooking, we share: She calls it it and I go to the door and pay for it!
The man refuses to put his laundry away. his is all over the bedroom for days after we (or I) do the laundry. Ok, I do all of the chores, but then he is in his first year of residency and I am looking for work.
My wife and I have been married for just over six years. I handle the finances, vacuuming, doing the laundry, dishes (esp. if my wife cooked), and breakfast. My wife usually does the shower/tub, dusting, and most of the dinner cooking (depending on when we get home). There certainly are chores that I prefer; the division of labor is based on preference or what we just want to get done rather than any sort of male/female delineation.
We both work, no kids. One person cooks and the other does the dishes. I cook more often, because I grew up cooking with my parents and he didn't, and consequently feels incapable. He does the laundry and a few more regular errands, I do more grocery shopping day-to-day picking up. We've been together nearly 10 years, and I know I used to do more than my share, but we've negotiated it to a more agreeable, equitable arrangement.
Let's bring children into the picture here...while it's currently more work to get them to do the chores, it is slowly becoming a family endeavor. Between my husband and I he cooks, I clean, then I cook and he cleans. The boys clear the table and do their laundry - at least they are supposed to.
Bottom line, our home is constantly a mess and when it gets too intollerable someone, usually me, starts barking orders to clean up.
MMN
The issue is not the type of housework but the way in which the work is done. My girlfriend tends to have certain techniques for washing laundry, washing dishes, wiping counters, and cleaning the bathroom. She tends to micromanage the cleaning process when I attempt to clean. I have always considered cleaning a great way to think and relax so it has truly become a chore. So I let her clean which causes some other issues. I think it is a control issue not a gender issue.
My wife does not even know where the broom/vacuum/mop is located. She grew up with a group of sisters and says that she never had to do any cleaning. She thinks that I am obsessed with cleaning because I despise thing being out of place or dirty and she does not even seem to notice. I also do the dishes and laundry, she does do some cooking and most of the grocery shopping. We both work outside of the home.
I did not go to a military academy and I still make my bed as soon as I get up and I make sure if nothing else (and that's usually the case) I make sure the bathroom is always--ALWAYS sparkling clean.
discontented wife
too busy to call!
My husband and i have been together 9 years and got married relatively young - he's a great cook and I'm a great prep chef and clean up crew! It just works - as far as other household stuff - we share it! I tend to do most of the laundry but he tends to do the hardcore cleaning like the floors etc. But we share most.And both work to keep the place tidy. I think this is just the way most of the younger generation operates. None of this 50's housewife crap!
In our home, my husband will do any household chore. Nothing is off limits for him. He will do and fold the laundry, organize the linen closet, clean the bathroom, brush and walk the dog, iron clothes, vacuum, dust, cook,and do the grocery shopping. He grew up in a home with two working parents. I am thankful to my mother-in law everyday since she raised such a wonderful domestic son.
My husband will cook, vaccuum, "fix" things, paint, laundry...I will do all of those things too.
He is supposed to do the garbage but I usually do it because he lets it pile up and it irritates me.
I do most of the deep cleaning though he would never admit to that.
My strategy is to not get married. Problem solved!
Oh we just share almost every house work together.
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