When Americans say "gun control," we mean "gun inconvenience." We mean "gun paperwork." We mean "filling out gun forms."

Wishful thinking isn't going to diminish Grover's influence. But everyone getting off of their collective lazy bums come primary day certainly will.

I’m going to tell you why you should care: Ken Cuccinelli is about as moderate as a punch in the face. If he wins, which is very possible, any talk of the Republican Party moving back to the center will go by the wayside.

So now what? Will this cause our daughters to listen to jazz? Will everyone become jabbering leftists who burn the American flag and mock U.S. war dead?

Can we stop to think for a second about how staggeringly pointless it is to expect sexual and moral purity from the head of the CIA?

Indiana is as red as a baboons butt, but the Tea Party candidate was still too far to the right for Indiana voters, particularly when said candidate had such interesting ideas about God and rape.

It says something about the guy and his attitude towards women when you consider that even his self-generated, wishful-thinking scenarios seem completely outdated.

The next installment of our game “One for the Aliens, One for the Sun” asks listeners to make tough choices about songs in Neil Young’s catalog.

I can turn on the TV, watch Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, or I can drive over to the federally subsidized Kennedy Center and watch Dr. Lonnie Smith crush it on the Hammond organ with his trio.

When people see stories where the premise is “D.C. = rich people,” they make that leap into “government worker = rich people,” which is a little like making the assumption that everyone in Vegas is a casino owner.

If conservatives worship the self-made man who gives to the community because he wants to and not because he has to, then they should be lining up to not only eat at Big Apple Pizza but to kiss Scott Van Duzer on the face.

Let me preface this by saying that if the Baltimore Ravens stadium were on fire, and I had just finished drinking a six pack of beer, as a Redskins fan I would do nothing to help put the fire out.

Hey Congress, please let people with either a legitimate science background or at least a respect for science serve on the Science Committee.

(Disclaimer: Don’t actually go out and punch Todd Akin in the privates. I’m sure that over the next few months, simply being Todd Akin will be punishment enough.)

If only there were laws that would emphasize how terrible those crimes are, or if only there were a way to add extra legal penalties to the sentences of people who kill and maim based on hatred for others!

Two guys, the same illness, the same treatment - two very different results.

In a lot of states, it’s easier to get into medical school than it is to get state-ordered psychiatric care.

I don’t believe that Maryland Republicans are racist. I truly don’t. They’re just practical. If black voters had a tendency to vote in a manner that pleased the Maryland Republican Party, they would help them get to the polls.

It’s hard for me to get really worked up over American policy becoming inconvenient to religious beliefs, particularly when the religious beliefs of others are quite often cheerfully inserted into the lives of Americans.

How can the governor of a state absolutely up to its hips in federal loot and absolutely dependent on said loot claim to want the government out of the lives of her fellow citizens?